1. |
130
03:31
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I think I may just be on to something here
Is what I’d tell myself if I had nothing to fear
But this 130th draft is speaking to me.
Writing for myself seems to get harder and harder but
Writing through you seems to be like the start of
The end of those long nights not knowing what to do
But maybe just once I can see one of these through
Start of the end I say but really I don’t know
I could go on to 131 but wait woah now
Slow down, don’t get ahead of yourself right yet
Let’s at least hear the chorus before you trash and forget, so
Hurricane, in my brain, words swirling ‘round
But none are connecting, none at least that I’ve found
So I take a new number and start all again
Can you please help me can you please be my friend
‘Cus there’s a Hurricane, in my brain, thoughts falling out
I’m here and I’m worried, but I won’t scream and shout
Because I still have faith, which may be a lie
But you fake it ‘till you make it, just try not to die doing so
Hurricane, in my brain, words swirling ‘round
But none are connecting, none at least that I’ve found
So I take a new number and start all again
Can you please help me can you please be my friend
‘Cus there’s a Hurricane, in my brain, thoughts falling out
I’m here and I’m worried, but I won’t scream and shout
Because I still have faith, which may be a lie
But you fake it ‘till you make it, just try not to die doing so
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2. |
Ricochet
04:06
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3. |
Grain Of Salt
06:17
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Please accept this apology even though it’s been so long
I know this isn’t the first time, but I know that I was wrong
Forgive and forget is what they say, but how can you do that for me?
It’s too much to ask, so don’t tell just for simplicity’s sake
Different times are different lives
Different journeys we all go through
But different lies call for different
Despising ideologies that I see in you
Everyone changes, like the channels on TV
Could be for better, or for worse
But then there’s little old me
Too scared for lovin’, too scared for fuckin’
Double entendre screwin’ up just walkin’
Everything I do is in good taste
So I say to myself as I take it at my own pace
You talk too much, yet you don’t say enough
Empty promises of being “up to snuff”
You are loved, you are cherished, you are just what they want
Another cog in the machine that society runs ‘cause
Oh I know where I’ve been going
But I can tell where you’ve been
You’ve got marks and scratches, and loving patches
Let me wash away all this sin
In the crystal basin of the fountain of yore
Wash away the blood until I am pure
And I know…
I’ll be clean
Now let’s make this clear
I love you more than anything
But the constant lies that wrap my mind
Are what makes me sing
I don’t wanna let you down
But that ship may have sailed
And I wanna be friends
But I just sit here and fail
Take this all with a grain of salt
‘Cause I don’t know how it’s all my fault
And yet I’m the one who’s saying it is
While the Chains of Time go and chase our kids
Our kids are becoming adults now
‘Cause you can’t catch time from the calf to the cow
For the smilies and fantasies we all dream about
It’s melting our faces and giving us gout
And drugging us up, and killing us all
But before that we must first suffer the fall
In the bottomless pit that you stumbled on once
But the cover’s revealed so it’s time to, what? Jump!
And you’re falling forever, but is that quantified?
And you’re just terrified, fate is solidified
This is not dignified, what does it signify?
Yeah you’re going to die, yeah you’re going to die
Oh I know where I’ve been going
But I can tell where you’ve been
You’ve got marks and scratches, and loving patches
Let me wash away all this sin
In the crystal basin in the fountain of yore
Wash away the blood until I am pure
And I know…
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4. |
Belong
04:45
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There’s a light in the dark shining bright
Like a moth to a flame in your sight
Drawn closer, you fly over there
You belonging just seems fair
A sense of hope, a sense of doubt
A sense of something you can’t live without
Just fit in, just be normal
Why not be loved?
A dying star in a wormhole
I belong here
I belong here
I belong here
I belong here
Well I came to some realization
When my schedule was cleared
No more life, no more meaning
It’s everything I feared
But with the knocking on the door to my mind
I figured something was wrong
What do you do when there’s nothing to do
Well you sing that goddamn song, and it goes like…
Well the sign says no entry
There’s cobwebs on the floor
Apologies for the mess I’ve made
I just can’t do this no more
I would invite you in to stay a while
But the AC’s on blast and the conditions are vile
Turn your back to the mess and let out a sigh
I’ll change again one more time, and it goes like…
Oh oh oh oh I want to belong here
Oh oh oh oh I want to belong
Oh oh oh oh I want to belong here
Oh oh oh oh I want to belong
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5. |
Here, Now
04:21
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Backed up against a closing door
Heard a thing I had dreaded before
The words bouncing off against the floor
God I just don’t want to hide it
It’s just something that I adore
Nothing less, and nothing more
And yet I strain ’til my mind is sore
God there’s no need to fight it
I just don’t wanna seem too exceedingly dramatic
I blow out the proportion, most are just empathetic
Understanding, all supportive, caring, and not overbearing
But the select few who decide to take it and go blaring
All over the neighborhood, “hey look at that weirdo”
“He’s just like you and me except there’s something you don’t know”
Then they blabber on for days on end, while you worry of what’s been said
Subconsciously you know it’s fine, the sticks and stones will come in time
Is it you that I’m looking for
When I finally open that door
Nothing less, but so much more
God I belong here now
Is it you that I’m looking for
Open arms staring on, yeah that’s for sure
So I run and I jump, and I hit the floor
And I’ll laugh it off now
Second family coming into play
Cause I’m thinking about you every day
You may be distant, and we may not talk much
But damnit I love you and I’ll sing just as such
Yeah I’ll call to the towers, I’ll sing with the choir
I’ll do everything that my heart desires
I’ll call to the people, preaching to the liars
I’ll do everything that my damn heart desires
Is it you that I’m looking for
When I finally open that door
Nothing less, but so much more
God I belong here now
Is it you that I’m looking for
Open arms staring on, yeah that’s for sure
So I run and I jump, and I hit the floor
And I’ll laugh it off now
Is it you that I’m looking for
When I finally open that door
Nothing less, but so much more
God I belong here now
Is it you that I’m looking for
Open arms staring on, yeah that’s for sure
So I run and I jump, and I hit the floor
And I’ll laugh it off now
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6. |
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So this is where we leave you off in the end
You say “you don’t know where you’re going”
I say “don’t matter, just keep hoping”
Your eyes the glimmer through the smoke and mirrors
Before us all
So this is where we say goodbye in the end
I don’t want to finish this
Maybe I shouldn’t finish this
Maybe we shouldn’t finish this
Are we premature?
Well there’s a million things that I’ve gotta say
Before the ground takes me back and I start to decay
But until then…
The train’s leaving
I’ve never been that good at saying goodbye
That’s why I’m dragging on
Don’t even know how to close this song
Got a couple more minutes longer
Then it fades away
There’s so many ways to close a thought on a page
Yet I can’t think of one
How do you just leave off be done
How do you not just carry on
I’ll stop thinking now
‘Cause there’s a million things that I’ve gotta do
Before life slips away and all that’s left is you
But until then…
Train’s leaving
I think I may just be onto something here
Is what I told myself, but now it’s been over a year
So I think we’re done, I think there’s nothing left to fear
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